If you didn't see the eighth inning of tonight's game, just imagine J.C. Romero trying to pitch ... after eight beers, four shots and a car bomb. There were bases-loaded walks, bases-loaded hit batters, and of course pitching changes galore thanks to the insufferable Tony La Russa.
In the end, the Phillies scored nine runs in the eighth en route to a bizarre 10-2 win. Lost in the Cardinals' hideous bullpen display was Ben Francisco's first RBI since the Clinton administration and two-run insurance singles by Jimmy Rollins and Chase Utley. One of the hit batsmen was Placido Polanco, who left the game after being plunked in the hand. The injury didn't seem too serious.
Miguel Batista: Any pitcher who walks Michael Martinez with the bases loaded deserves his own section in the recap.
Doc report: Through little fault of his own, Roy Halladay matched his season low with six innings pitched (He was lifted for a pinch hitter, Ross Gload, who tied the game at 1-1 with an RBI single.) Doc yielded one run and four hits but was unable to become the first MLB pitcher to 10 victories.
Next up: Same time, same place on Wednesday night. The matchup is Cliff Lee against former Phils righty Kyle Lohse. Lee is 3-0 with an 0.38 ERA in his last three starts, while Lohse has cooled off following a hot start to the season.